I Fell

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I had too much pride. I was proud of my skill. I was proud of my plane and like Icarus might overreached. I looked at a state airport, a rarely used dirt strip in the woods near Lake Wenatchee. I ignored the voices of caution telling me that this was not easy.

I knew the moment the plane was airborne but I wanted to abort the takeoff and I knew the runway was too short. I was in a corridor no place to turn and no hope but to out climb trees. I almost succeeded. Another 10 feet and I would've been free and in the air. But that was not to be.

I remember hitting the trees.

I do not believe in God. I cannot give another credit or blame for what happened next. Somewhere a dice was thrown and my fate and that of my passenger were in the hands of the universe.

 

I died my broken body and that of my passenger were removed from the plane and taken to the local more. This might have happened. Perhaps it was the highest odds on the dice but it did not happen.

The dice spun and when they came up I had my life. I had my mind. I had my arms. I could not feel my legs. My passenger was in even better shape and while there are injuries she will ultimately regain almost everything. One day she will dance and through her I will move in ways that may never be able to do.

 

Like a Icarus I have been hurled down by my pride and I lie in a hospital bed rebuilding my life.

 

The first lesson I learned is humility. I have sinned the sin of pride and not just in the air. I I have committed the sin of hubris in other ways. Many people, the waitresses, many of my students and others have been allowed to drift in and out of my life as shadows unknown, unnoticed and anonymous.

The lesson I learn lying in my hospital bed is there are no anonymous people. Everyone who comes to me every nurse, every aide, every student has a name and a face and the story. They are part of my life and no longer unnamed and unnoticed. In this is the great lesson I learned when I fell. You have no pride. You are one player in a great drama that flows around to a new universe for its own reasons has allowed you to continue to play.